Update-164
"mujhe to pahle se hee andaja tha ki iska kuchh yahi haal hoga....abhi isko heart attack bhi aayega"
.
"mujhe yakin nahi ho raha ki tum humare liye khana laye ho, thanks...lekin Divya aur Megha bhi chori-chori neeche gayi hai...."
"us R.Divya me itna talent aur himmat kaha se aa gaya "
"R.Divya ka matlab..."
"R.Divya ka matlab.....hmm...Respected Divya "Sulabh ke hahakar se jo khane ke packet bach gaye the unhe Esha ko pakdate hue maine man me socha"Chal ab i love you bol aur kiss kar "
"mujhe samajh nahi raha ki main tumse dinner loon ya rahne doon..."hatho ki taraf dekhte hue Esha boli....
"jyada mat soch...dimag par asar padta hai, bindas hokar khane ka phhir so jane ka bole to KPS "
"KPS means Krishna public school..."
"ye le are humari dictionary me to IIT ka full form bhi ' Indian Institute of Technology' nahi hota to phhir KPS ka full form krishna Public school kaise hoga...KPS ka matlab hai khao,piyo aur so jao..."
"ok..then KPS to you..."bolkar Esha aise khush hui jaise kitna bhari dialogue mar diya ho...
"to main chalta hoon..."(i love you bol... )
"haan jao..."palat kar jate hue Esha boli, lekin kuchh door aage jane ke baad pata nahi usko kya hua ,jo wo ekdum se palti...uske tevar dekhkar main hairan pareshan ho gaya....
"apna khana apne sath le jao...mujhe koyi jaroorat nahi..."wahi se khane ki packets meri taraf fek kar Esha boli"aur dobara mujhse baat karne ki koshish mat karna yaha tak ki mere karib bhi mat bhatakna,..."
"teri maa ki isko kya hua...abhi to achchhe se baat kar rahi thi..."hazar volts current ke jhatke khate hue meri aankhe fat ki fati rah gayi thi aur muh kayi inch tak khul gaya tha....Esha ka aisa roop maine ab se pahle kabhi nahi dekha tha, use gusse me dekha tha lekin aisa kali maa wala roop pahli baar dekh raha tha.....dil aur dimag me kayi sawal liye maine usase puchha...
"kya hua..."
"apna ye ahsaan jo zameen par pada hai use uthao aur yaha se dafa ho jao..."
"are lekin ye to bata hua kya....tujhme ye zero to infinite wala parivartan kaise aur kyun aa gaya..."bhadak main bhi sakta tha lekin Esha ka lihaaj karte hue khud par control karke rakha hua tha....
"ek baar me sunayi nahi deta kya...maine kaha na dafa ho jao yaha se..."
"dekh billi, mera body temerature mat badha...nahi to..."
"nahi to kya...tumne Gautam ke sath jo kya uske baad tum iski ummid rakhte ho ki main tumse sahi dhang se baat karungi...kuchh der pahle to main ek pal ke liye jaise sab kuchh bhool hee gayi thi,warna camp ke andar ghusne nahi deti.ab ye apna sada sa khana uthao aur chalte bano..."
"control kar be...gali mat dena isko..."jab tak main Esha ke camp me tha tab tak main har pal khud se yahi kahta raha aur ispar kamyab bhi hua....Esha ko yun mujh par bhadakta dekh mera dil kar raha tha ki apna collar upar karu, goggle aankh me chadha kar Esha par apni galiyo ki puri dictionary khali kar doon....
Lekin dikkat ye thi ki mera shirt without collar tha ,Goggle to ek din pahle hee kho chuka tha aur Esha ka chehra dekhkar meri galiyo ki dictionary khul hee nahi rahi thi....maine zameen par pade hue khane ke packet uthaye aur waha se jate hue Esha se bola...
"meri nahi to kam se kam is khane ki to ijjat ki hoti...khair koyi baat nahi, KPS"
.
Esha ke camp se nikal kar main apne camp ki taraf badha...mujhe samajh nahi aa raha tha ki Esha mujhpar achanak itna bhadak kyun gayi ? Kyunki yadi use mujhpar bhadakna hee tha to shuru se hee bhadakti...shuru me pyar-mohabbat dikha kar baad me gali dena ye kaha ka vyavhar hai...in ladkiyo ko kabhi hum garib ladko ke Armano ki kadra hee nahi hoti.shuru me uske haav-bhav se aisa lag raha tha ki abhi mujhe ' i love you' bol degi...lekin sari ummido ko jala kar rakh kar diya
"to beta aur bhago uske peechhe,apun to college ke pahle din se hee usase door rahne ko bola tha lekin nahi...tumhare hee pichhwade me ungali ho rahi thi ab bhugto..."apni camp ki taraf jate hue main khud se lad raha tha....kabhi main ek pahlu se Esha ki burayi karta to kabhi dusare pahlu se uska bachav karta....
"are beta...dar mat,mard ban....ye Megha,Vibha..jaisi laundiya to baye hath ka khel hai...yadi damdari dikhani hai to Esha jaisi kisi khubsurat item ko set karne ka....warna zindagi bhar mutth marne ka...."
.
"dhat teri ki..."apna sar pakad kar main jaha tha wahi khada ho gaya aur khud se bola" i love daru more than Esha...nahi...i love Esha more than daru....nope, i love Daru more than Esha...chup ho ja bose dk ,i love Esha more than daru...tujhe tere lund ki kasam ...i love daru more than....................."
"tumhari maa ki "main cheekha ,chillaya aur jab khud se jujhate hue dhyan diya to paya ki main pahadi ke ekdum kinare me khada hoon.jaha se do-char kadam yadi main aur aage badhata to seedhe bhagwan se face to face milta....
"BC, mujhe nahi lagta ki aise me main jyada din tak zinda rahunga...is Esha ka kuchh to karna padega..."badbadate hue main turant waha se peechhe kuda...
.
Apne camp ki taraf badhte hue Maine ghadi me time dekha ,raat ke 11 baj rahe the....mere dil aur dimag ke world war ke baad main ab ek-do peg markar shanti se sona chahta tha....lekin jab camp ke andar pahucha to warden waha pahle se maujood tha...
"MC sala..."warden ko camp ke andar dekh maine dil hee dil me kaha....
"kaha gaye the Sir..."gadhe ke gand jaisa muh banate hue warden ne puchha...
"peshab karne gaya tha..."
Warden ne mujhe apne bagal me baithaya aur 'beta-beta' bolkar bahut sari naseehat di aur waha se chala gaya......jab warden waha se khiska to maine socha ki ab chup-chap do peg markar so jata hoon lekin mere khas dost Arun ke gand me illi thi....
.
"tune aaj mera bahut dil dukhaya hai..."jab main apni aankhe band karke let gaya to mujhe hilate hue Arun ne kaha...
"ek kaam kar...tu gand mara aur dobara mujhe touch kiya to gand fad dalunga..."
"tu ek baar bol de ki ' i love daru more than Esha'...bas baat khatm..."
"nahi bolunga...jo ukhad sakta hai ukhad le..."
"tere paas hai hee kya ukhadne ko...tu bol de aaj ,warna sone nahi dunga..."
"beta jitna bada tu nahi hai,usase bada to mera lund hai...aur ek baat bata, tu sale kahi Gay to nahi hai..."
"Arun chahe gay ho ya lesbian, pahle tu ye bata ki tujhe Esha jyada pyari hai ya hum log..."abki baar Saurabh ke pichhwade me illi hui aur wo bhi uthkar baith gaya....
.
iske baad to ek-ek karke sabke pichhwade me mano kisi ne lamba danda ghused diya , sale sab mujhe dhikkar rahe the yaha tak ki Rajshri Pandey bhi...
"Arman bhai...maine jo aaj aapke liye kiya wo saat janam me yadi Esha ne kabhi kar diya to maa kasam main Rajshri khana band kar dunga...."
"Arman ,pahle friend baad me girl firend..."Sulabh bhi naseehat dete hue bola...
"abey tum sabne bhang chadha rakhi hai kya,jo itni raat ko aisi behuda bakwas kar rahe ho...so jao.."bolte hue maine phhir chadar tani ,lekin Arun ne chadar chheenkar door zameen par fek diya...
"beta ,bol de ki ' i love daru more than Esha' warna...tujhe camp se bahar nikal denge...sale wo laundiya humse badi hai kya...."
.
Jab sab dost aapke khilaf ho jaye to badi aafat hoti hai yar ! Na chahte hue bhi wo karna padta hai...jo karne me ratti bhar bhi interest nahi hota....main, zameen par door padi apni chadar ko kuchh der tak dekhta raha aur phhir use uthakar Arun ki taraf dekhkar bola...
"sale,wo kaha surajmukhi aur tu kaha jwalamukhi...zameen-aasman ka antar hai tum dono me...main dusare camp me so jaunga lekin wo nahi bolunga...jo tum log mujhse bulwana chahte ho....good night "
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"mujhe to pahle se hee andaja tha ki iska kuchh yahi haal hoga....abhi isko heart attack bhi aayega"
.
"mujhe yakin nahi ho raha ki tum humare liye khana laye ho, thanks...lekin Divya aur Megha bhi chori-chori neeche gayi hai...."
"us R.Divya me itna talent aur himmat kaha se aa gaya "
"R.Divya ka matlab..."
"R.Divya ka matlab.....hmm...Respected Divya "Sulabh ke hahakar se jo khane ke packet bach gaye the unhe Esha ko pakdate hue maine man me socha"Chal ab i love you bol aur kiss kar "
"mujhe samajh nahi raha ki main tumse dinner loon ya rahne doon..."hatho ki taraf dekhte hue Esha boli....
"jyada mat soch...dimag par asar padta hai, bindas hokar khane ka phhir so jane ka bole to KPS "
"KPS means Krishna public school..."
"ye le are humari dictionary me to IIT ka full form bhi ' Indian Institute of Technology' nahi hota to phhir KPS ka full form krishna Public school kaise hoga...KPS ka matlab hai khao,piyo aur so jao..."
"ok..then KPS to you..."bolkar Esha aise khush hui jaise kitna bhari dialogue mar diya ho...
"to main chalta hoon..."(i love you bol... )
"haan jao..."palat kar jate hue Esha boli, lekin kuchh door aage jane ke baad pata nahi usko kya hua ,jo wo ekdum se palti...uske tevar dekhkar main hairan pareshan ho gaya....
"apna khana apne sath le jao...mujhe koyi jaroorat nahi..."wahi se khane ki packets meri taraf fek kar Esha boli"aur dobara mujhse baat karne ki koshish mat karna yaha tak ki mere karib bhi mat bhatakna,..."
"teri maa ki isko kya hua...abhi to achchhe se baat kar rahi thi..."hazar volts current ke jhatke khate hue meri aankhe fat ki fati rah gayi thi aur muh kayi inch tak khul gaya tha....Esha ka aisa roop maine ab se pahle kabhi nahi dekha tha, use gusse me dekha tha lekin aisa kali maa wala roop pahli baar dekh raha tha.....dil aur dimag me kayi sawal liye maine usase puchha...
"kya hua..."
"apna ye ahsaan jo zameen par pada hai use uthao aur yaha se dafa ho jao..."
"are lekin ye to bata hua kya....tujhme ye zero to infinite wala parivartan kaise aur kyun aa gaya..."bhadak main bhi sakta tha lekin Esha ka lihaaj karte hue khud par control karke rakha hua tha....
"ek baar me sunayi nahi deta kya...maine kaha na dafa ho jao yaha se..."
"dekh billi, mera body temerature mat badha...nahi to..."
"nahi to kya...tumne Gautam ke sath jo kya uske baad tum iski ummid rakhte ho ki main tumse sahi dhang se baat karungi...kuchh der pahle to main ek pal ke liye jaise sab kuchh bhool hee gayi thi,warna camp ke andar ghusne nahi deti.ab ye apna sada sa khana uthao aur chalte bano..."
"control kar be...gali mat dena isko..."jab tak main Esha ke camp me tha tab tak main har pal khud se yahi kahta raha aur ispar kamyab bhi hua....Esha ko yun mujh par bhadakta dekh mera dil kar raha tha ki apna collar upar karu, goggle aankh me chadha kar Esha par apni galiyo ki puri dictionary khali kar doon....
Lekin dikkat ye thi ki mera shirt without collar tha ,Goggle to ek din pahle hee kho chuka tha aur Esha ka chehra dekhkar meri galiyo ki dictionary khul hee nahi rahi thi....maine zameen par pade hue khane ke packet uthaye aur waha se jate hue Esha se bola...
"meri nahi to kam se kam is khane ki to ijjat ki hoti...khair koyi baat nahi, KPS"
.
Esha ke camp se nikal kar main apne camp ki taraf badha...mujhe samajh nahi aa raha tha ki Esha mujhpar achanak itna bhadak kyun gayi ? Kyunki yadi use mujhpar bhadakna hee tha to shuru se hee bhadakti...shuru me pyar-mohabbat dikha kar baad me gali dena ye kaha ka vyavhar hai...in ladkiyo ko kabhi hum garib ladko ke Armano ki kadra hee nahi hoti.shuru me uske haav-bhav se aisa lag raha tha ki abhi mujhe ' i love you' bol degi...lekin sari ummido ko jala kar rakh kar diya
"to beta aur bhago uske peechhe,apun to college ke pahle din se hee usase door rahne ko bola tha lekin nahi...tumhare hee pichhwade me ungali ho rahi thi ab bhugto..."apni camp ki taraf jate hue main khud se lad raha tha....kabhi main ek pahlu se Esha ki burayi karta to kabhi dusare pahlu se uska bachav karta....
"are beta...dar mat,mard ban....ye Megha,Vibha..jaisi laundiya to baye hath ka khel hai...yadi damdari dikhani hai to Esha jaisi kisi khubsurat item ko set karne ka....warna zindagi bhar mutth marne ka...."
.
"dhat teri ki..."apna sar pakad kar main jaha tha wahi khada ho gaya aur khud se bola" i love daru more than Esha...nahi...i love Esha more than daru....nope, i love Daru more than Esha...chup ho ja bose dk ,i love Esha more than daru...tujhe tere lund ki kasam ...i love daru more than....................."
"tumhari maa ki "main cheekha ,chillaya aur jab khud se jujhate hue dhyan diya to paya ki main pahadi ke ekdum kinare me khada hoon.jaha se do-char kadam yadi main aur aage badhata to seedhe bhagwan se face to face milta....
"BC, mujhe nahi lagta ki aise me main jyada din tak zinda rahunga...is Esha ka kuchh to karna padega..."badbadate hue main turant waha se peechhe kuda...
.
Apne camp ki taraf badhte hue Maine ghadi me time dekha ,raat ke 11 baj rahe the....mere dil aur dimag ke world war ke baad main ab ek-do peg markar shanti se sona chahta tha....lekin jab camp ke andar pahucha to warden waha pahle se maujood tha...
"MC sala..."warden ko camp ke andar dekh maine dil hee dil me kaha....
"kaha gaye the Sir..."gadhe ke gand jaisa muh banate hue warden ne puchha...
"peshab karne gaya tha..."
Warden ne mujhe apne bagal me baithaya aur 'beta-beta' bolkar bahut sari naseehat di aur waha se chala gaya......jab warden waha se khiska to maine socha ki ab chup-chap do peg markar so jata hoon lekin mere khas dost Arun ke gand me illi thi....
.
"tune aaj mera bahut dil dukhaya hai..."jab main apni aankhe band karke let gaya to mujhe hilate hue Arun ne kaha...
"ek kaam kar...tu gand mara aur dobara mujhe touch kiya to gand fad dalunga..."
"tu ek baar bol de ki ' i love daru more than Esha'...bas baat khatm..."
"nahi bolunga...jo ukhad sakta hai ukhad le..."
"tere paas hai hee kya ukhadne ko...tu bol de aaj ,warna sone nahi dunga..."
"beta jitna bada tu nahi hai,usase bada to mera lund hai...aur ek baat bata, tu sale kahi Gay to nahi hai..."
"Arun chahe gay ho ya lesbian, pahle tu ye bata ki tujhe Esha jyada pyari hai ya hum log..."abki baar Saurabh ke pichhwade me illi hui aur wo bhi uthkar baith gaya....
.
iske baad to ek-ek karke sabke pichhwade me mano kisi ne lamba danda ghused diya , sale sab mujhe dhikkar rahe the yaha tak ki Rajshri Pandey bhi...
"Arman bhai...maine jo aaj aapke liye kiya wo saat janam me yadi Esha ne kabhi kar diya to maa kasam main Rajshri khana band kar dunga...."
"Arman ,pahle friend baad me girl firend..."Sulabh bhi naseehat dete hue bola...
"abey tum sabne bhang chadha rakhi hai kya,jo itni raat ko aisi behuda bakwas kar rahe ho...so jao.."bolte hue maine phhir chadar tani ,lekin Arun ne chadar chheenkar door zameen par fek diya...
"beta ,bol de ki ' i love daru more than Esha' warna...tujhe camp se bahar nikal denge...sale wo laundiya humse badi hai kya...."
.
Jab sab dost aapke khilaf ho jaye to badi aafat hoti hai yar ! Na chahte hue bhi wo karna padta hai...jo karne me ratti bhar bhi interest nahi hota....main, zameen par door padi apni chadar ko kuchh der tak dekhta raha aur phhir use uthakar Arun ki taraf dekhkar bola...
"sale,wo kaha surajmukhi aur tu kaha jwalamukhi...zameen-aasman ka antar hai tum dono me...main dusare camp me so jaunga lekin wo nahi bolunga...jo tum log mujhse bulwana chahte ho....good night "
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